can you imagine Oliver having to show up at quidditch trials and say ‘anyone who’s here to try out for seeker better go back up to the castle because an 11 year old boy rode a broom for the first time today and McGonagall gave him the seeker position before asking me or letting me see him play sorry guys’
“People will do anything to stop being lonely - just as people will do anything to stop suffocating…That is the great American disease, which is so easily exploited by cynical people. It’s loneliness. It is unbearable.”—Kurt Vonnegut. “The Melancholia of Everything Completed,” in Kurt Vonnegut: The Last Interview and Other Conversations. Edited by Tom McCartan. (Brooklyn: Melville House, 2011): 146. [This interview originally appeared in Stop Smiling, August 2006]. (via thesewindmills)
please describe what it is like to live in the us??
every morning my alarm gun wakes me up by firing directly over my head and if i dont immediately get up and sing the star spangled banner i get arrested. all matters in court are settled with opponents dressing up in bald eagle costumes and fighting to the death. theres an american flag tattooed across my face. once i saw someone get punched in the head repeatedly at a barbeque because they said they didnt like apple pie and nobody helped them. nobody even tried