Caddis fly larvae protect their developing bodies by building themselves sheaths of silk and incorporating substances found in their habitats. Artist Hubert Duprate placed a group of Caddis fly larvae into a tank with gold and other precious substances for the larvae to spin into their sheaths.
I love America because the majority of teenagers who want to take initiative and further their education in order to follow their dreams are forced to take on a monstrous debt that will probably haunt them through a siginificant part of their life at the age of 17 or 18
The Right Wing decided it wanted to play Monday Morning Quarterback with my lady parts this year. It seems like an odd choice for a recreational activity, especially since there’s no legislative or medical reason to suddenly introduce radically restrictive and dangerous legislation on women’s health and bodies. Maybe someone should introduce them to Pinterest instead.
Here are our Top 10 Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Attacks on Women’s Rights (just in the last 6 months!)
The Blunt Amendment. Reasonable religious exemptions weren’t enough for Roy Blunt. This amendment would have allowed your employer – not your doctor - to decide what kind of health care you could get based on his or her own personal moral or religious convictions.
The All-Male Birth Control Panel, or the Man Panel. Congressman Darrell Issa convened a panel to discuss the coverage of birth control – but refused to include any women.
Susan G. Komen Foundation defunds Planned Parenthood. Komen opted to cut off funding to the largest provider of reproductive health services in the US because of their new VP’s objection to a mere 3% of their activities.
Rush Limbaugh Calls Sandra Fluke a Prostitute and a Slut. After Sandra Fluke stood up for women everywhere, Rush Limbaugh took to the airwaves and called her a prostitute and a slut for speaking out in favor of birth control coverage. He also said she should have to put videos of her having sex online to compensate the taxpayers who “are going to pay for your contraceptives.” Classy.
Forced Trans-Vaginal Ultrasounds. Republican legislators in Virginia invited the commonwealth into the exam room when they proposed a bill that would require women seeking abortions to undergo an invasive, medically-unnecessary vaginal probe before their procedure.
Women in the Military Should “Expect” to be Raped. Responding to a 64% increase in the reports of rape and violent sexual assaults in the military, Fox News pundit Liz Trotta responds, “What did they expect?” She goes on to say that there is a bureaucracy of people to support these women who are being “raped too much.”
Foster Friess Suggests Women Put Aspirin Between Their Knees. Rick Santorum supporter, Foster Friess, reminisced about back in his day when ladies put aspirin between their knees for birth control. Back in his day, people also died of polio.
Mitt Romney doesn’t understand a woman’s reproductive system. Romney has publicly supported “personhood amendments,” which would ban abortion by declaring life begins at conception. When asked about how this affects birth control, Romney seemed to be completely unaware that hormonal forms of birth control stop implantation, not conception and would be banned under any personhood amendment.
And it’s only the middle of March.
For anybody who believes that sexism isn’t a thing that exists anymore
With the development of GPS controlled drones, far-reaching cheap radio equipment and tiny new computers like the Raspberry Pi, we’re going to experiment with sending out some small drones that will float some kilometers up in the air. This way our machines will have to be shut down with aeroplanes in order to shut down the system. A real act of war.
We’re just starting so we haven’t figured everything out yet. But we can’t limit ourselves to hosting things just on land anymore. These Low Orbit Server Stations (LOSS) are just the first attempt. With modern radio transmitters we can get over 100Mbps per node up to 50km away. For the proxy system we’re building, that’s more than enough.
On reading “Capturing The Light Of Dawn” in The Park Avenue corridor Of Grand Central Station
TIFFANY INTRODUCES RUBEDO™ METAL GLOWING WITH THE ROSE LUMINESCENCE OF A SUNRISE
Reading Tiffany’s new advertising campaign, “Capturing The Light Of Dawn,” stops you in your tracks. It’s not on every daily fatalistic trudge for survival that you encounter anything even approaching transcendental poetry, but here it is.
Still, of course, you remind yourself, it’s not real, couldn’t be real: It must be an illusion. How, you ask yourself, could an anonymous, talentless hack write such sensitive, sensuous copy? Could so confidently flaunt – with such insouciant aplomb – the conventions of capitalization (elevating the iotic of to such Regnal, Offal status)? How could a cubicled dunce tapping on an iPad coalesce these supernal Latin morphemes into congress so concisely – The Light Of Dawn, ROSE LUMINESCENCE, A SUNRISE… into such alchemical, uh, alchemy? Words which, when their stellar selves align, invoke Divine Pronouncement approaching the profundity of Saint-Simon’s Hand Of Greed, Of Poverty, Despair, Disparity and Of Denial. Of Indifference.
Software, perhaps, you speculate. Maybe IBM’s computer scientists, or Google’s, or other minions laboring in genteel urban campuses, math Ph.D.’s devoting their cosseted, unconsidered lives to the merchandising of consumer “goods,” have written a new software program, perhaps named, aptly, Bling-A-Ling or Mor4Moi, for the Benevolent Marketing Computers installed in the Lower Bowels of Madison Avenue for the demons who disrupt the unsuspecting world with their honk-honk bozo ball horns, telling the gullible what to desire, what to buy. That could explain it: a mathematical formula in which the input ennui, surfeit and selfish yield ravishing rubine gems.
Or luck. Maybe this humaniform nullity – this purveyor of drivel – won the linguistic lottery, opening a thesaurus to random pages, a monkey typing ermine, velvet, vetiver. Glowing… luminescence… rose… Jackpot !!!
Or maybe it was crowdsource datamined, the culled contributions of Tiffany’s Facebook fans (Rubedo has 2,214 likes, and 79 comments, including, “I want it ♥” and “… it’s SOOOOO Tiffany’s !!!”). You can see it now: “Help Tiffany name – and position – our new product. Win a genuine Tiffany peace sign charm and bracelet (retail value $295 [really] *employees of Tiffany and its agencies are ineligible; offer ends at midnight).”
In a marketing faux pas, Tiffany’s press release uses an inconsistent metaphor:
”In the medieval philosophy of alchemy, Rubedo was the title of the very highest achievement, when matter and spirit fused to create something of rare beauty.”
Nothing about “showing pink,” a post-orgasmic glow, or sun, or roses. No suggestive sheath or handcuff. Actually, rubedo refers to the resurrection of Jesus Christ and the mumbo-jumbo perfection of the alchemist from nigredo (blackness) to albedo (white lightness) and, finally, cinnabar rubedo. If you missed the implicit racism and religious subtext, please reread the preceding.
Then you realize that there’s another, darker possibility: a newly-minted MFA, student of several prominent poets, bringing Donne and Sappho to a day job in the Global Shithouse, while Byron, Browning, Shelley, Keats and Yeats giggle in their graves. Who knows: Maybe this now-fabled literary alchemist will rise high in the agency: Maybe Tiffany’s CEO will applaud this transmuter of words to cash (a pedestrian trick) for the benefit of shareholders.
City life distorts one’s perspectives. It’s easy to miss the subliminal messages: For example, the liquid rubedo homophones libido and the purpose of the purchase is to get your woman to spread her legs, to brand your chattel and to signal your status. Whether blood diamonds or fool’s gold, it’s all just a game, after all, and anything other than self-indulgence is time wasted.
Now imagine this headline:
“Capturing The Nihilism Of Materialism In A City, Country And World In Which Poverty And Homelessness Are Ignored, Healthcare Is Denied to Women, Children And The Poor, Economic Inequality Is Extolled, The Earth Is Ravaged, War Equals Profit, And Ignorance Is Strength”
Too wordy, you tell me; waaay too negative; SOOOOO Unpoetic !!! Who would buy That?
I like words. I like fat buttery words, such as ooze, turpitude, glutinous, toady. I like solemn, angular, creaky words, such as straitlaced, cantankerous, pecunious, valedictory. I like spurious, black-is-white words, such as mortician, liquidate, tonsorial, demi-monde. I like suave “V” words, such as Svengali, svelte, bravura, verve. I like crunchy, brittle, crackly words, such as splinter, grapple, jostle, crusty. I like sullen, crabbed, scowling words, such as skulk, glower, scabby, churl. I like Oh-Heavens, my-gracious, land’s-sake words, such as tricksy, tucker, genteel, horrid. I like elegant, flowery words, such as estivate, peregrinate, elysium, halcyon. I like wormy, squirmy, mealy words, such as crawl, blubber, squeal, drip. I like sniggly, chuckling words, such as cowlick, gurgle, bubble and burp.
I like the word screenwriter better than copywriter, so I decided to quit my job in a New York advertising agency and try my luck in Hollywood, but before taking the plunge I went to Europe for a year of study, contemplation and horsing around.
I have just returned and I still like words.
May I have a few with you?
385 Madison Avenue
“It was kind of a beautiful day, finally real summer in Indianapolis, warm and humid— the kind of weather that reminds you after a long winter that while the world wasn’t built for humans, we were built for the world.”—
“The Fault in Our Stars” (John Green)
(I briefly wanted to call the book It Was Kind of a Beautiful Day, but Julie convinced me I was insane.)